So much of what yoga is, is developing awareness of our body, mind, and spirit. Figuring out how to do that can feel overwhelming and daunting--especially when you feel stuck.
I find myself questioning everything--at times ad nauseum. "Why am I feeling this way?" "Why won't my body cooperate when my mind can do these beautiful asanas with ease?" "When will I ever get rid of my chronic pain?"
These questions are like a hamster running on its exercise wheel. He moves fast, but gets nowhere. I pray for balance in my life with my kids, with work and play, with my husband, and finding time for myself. But what I think I need to pray for more is for acceptance of where I am at right now. I want everything fixed and I get frustrated when pain takes over. So lately I've devoted myself to these things:
1. Finish reading Rod Stryker's book The Four Desires: Creating a Life of Purpose, Happiness, Prosperity, and Freedom and completing all the activities in there
2. Continue going to Svaroopa yoga classes each month (2+ more each month)
3. Accept where my pain level is at each day: manage it through yoga, meditation, and Yes, medication
4. Be gentle with myself
I know that my perspective will change. And I need to enjoy the flow.
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