Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Weaving Imperfection into Life

I just had an appointment with my therapist. As always, he says something that I need to hear, a little nugget as I refer to it, to take with me. Today I was talking about events not going as planned, and people not responding as soon as I feel they should respond. In situations like this I feel like I'm losing control and sacrificing my peacefulness as a result.

I always strive for perfection in my life which can be very difficult to live up to. I finished painting my bathroom and began to hang stuff up on the walls. I had to hang my mirror three different times to get it right, and as a result, have four holes in my new drywall. I told my therapist I wanted to spackle over it, paint it, then rehang my mirror. He suggested I leave it and try to think of Native Americans who weave imperfections into their tapestries so as not to offend God or the spirits. HERE was my nugget for the day.

So I will proudly hang the mirror over the imperfections in my wall and try to remember that I need to embrace my own imperfections as well: my need to be perfect, my need to feel uncluttered emotionally and spiritually, and my need to be in control of my chronic pain at all times. Alas, I know these are imperfections which are an annoying part of my self, but maybe for today I'll accept them for what they are: human attributes of an imperfect human.

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